Blythe Masters, Financial Magician
(The inventor of credit default swaps)

Blythe Masters? Still around? With her financial magic?
A new way of banks "making money" that's as bad as the old?
Does Dimon still listen to her?
Does he mind being told?

Made lots of money whenever you sold them?
Lost even more when you got greedy and bought?
How long did it take out in the marketplace
Before her credit derivatives started to rot?

Underlying values were no longer there.
Gone to heaven or hell? No one seemed to know where.
To hell in a basket, as it turned out,
Leaving most all active traders to sputter and spout.

Blythe in the meantime is in to something new,
Mercy, have mercy. Don't let her continue.
Cap and trade carbon? Buy and sell CO2?
You're adamant, vehement! There's no way you will!
Then you talk to Blythe Masters, and damn it you do...

Who lets her loose on an unsuspecting public??
On financial experts who're supposed to know better?
Blame Jamie Dimon. Looks like he's once again guilty.
Instead of a public hanging, the damn fool has let her.

Bob Carlson

To 'Woman Who Invented Credit Default Swaps
     is One of the Key Architects of Carbon Derivatives,'

To 'London Whale Resurfaces in Potential U.S. JPMorgan Case’'
To 'U.S. Said to Plan to Arrest Pair in Big Bank Loss’'
To 'More J.P. Morgan's Jamie Dimon in Rhymed Verse'
To 'More Bush League Banks in Rhymed Verse'