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Bushie Seeks A Psychic Bushie's consults a psychic regarding his retirement program "Impeach him! Impeach him!", ev'ry audience jeers. How dare they not worship my blood, sweat and tears? Uh, well, maybe not mine, but why should that matter? My ratings are dropping. I'm mad as a hatter. But my biggest worry is what's gonna happen When John McCain loses and Justice stops nappin'. When they find it was me who sponsored the "looting", Then sold it on Yoohoo, who'll they be persecuting? ************ So I Googled for psychics and found Wanda Woo, Whose predictions Rush warrants are predictably true. Woo says, "Nixon Republicans, facing wholesale rejection, Established a program Dick dubbed Villain Protection. "Forget about witnesses who deserve a black eye. Instead they would safeguard each culprit's white lie. We'll start with you, Bushie. Although Cheney's the worst, Woo sees him and Old Mac going out feetfirst first." ************ Remember this comes to you Via sweet Wanda Woo, Whose predictions Rush warrants Are predictably true. ************ "You'll run ads on Face Book for a me-look-alike, Whose mouth's unaware when his brain is on strike. This is the guy due to spend years in prison While Laura insists, 'The fault isn't his'n.' His name incident'lly, if you're duped like he's been, Which we hope that you're not, is O'Shaughnessy-Flynn. "The original me meanwhile gets a face lift 'The nose and the chin will be getting short shrift,' So sayeth the surgeon, Dr. Honeybee Lee, The doc who for years offered my smirk for free, Which, until John McCain, was her most hated grin. So flared nostrils for me plus Jay's NBC chin." ************ And it goes without saying This can't go beyond you, These predictions Rush warrants From sweet Wanda Woo. ************ "A new name's essential. My old one won't do, So Woo picks Ignatius Y. Peckinpaw-Poo, A name more distinguished than mine was before. That one's been linked to too much blood, sweat and gore "With strong anesthetics and a chisel or two, Lee whittles away at I. Peckinpaw-Poo. 'When the bandage comes off,' declares Honeybee Lee, 'And you look in the mirror, you're going to love what you see.' "I'm sent to a hideout, a resort in Montana, While Lee joins an AMA bash in Havana. Two months later a letter arrives addressed to 'The Man With The Smirk, I. Peckinpaw-Poo.' 'Take the bandages off', the letter instructs. 'You'll love how you look in a Men's Warehouse tux.' "I look in the mirror and I'm here to tell you Old photos of Flynn look like new Peckinpaw-Poo! Seems the short shrift Lee promised Poo's nose and Poo's chin, Means I, Peckinpaw-Poo, have been took in like Flynn." As you could be, too, if you vote for McCain. And buy his malarkey linking torture and pain. ************ If this has seemed a bit lengthy, like my stay in DC, Remember it's what Woo is predicting for me. I can beg your forgiveness, now as Peckinpaw-Poo, And if Mac succeeds me, he and Wanda will, too.
Bob Carlson To 'McCain's Voting Ploys' |