Torture's So Republican
Let the punishment fit the crime
Torture's so Republican.
It doesn't matter if it works,
As long as it is in the news.
It's one of television's perks.
What other purpose does it serve?
Depends on whom and why it's used.
It's wrong for mass interrogation;
great for keeping us amused.
Public hangings in prime time?
Or perhaps decapitation?
Bet their higher Nielsen ratings
trump Meet The Press and Face The Nation.
The problem stems from Cable News.
Most offer torture secondhand
Except, of course, CNBC,
Which, it would seem, does understand.
Tips from Kramer let us lose
our own children's school tuition,
Making him a candidate for
future CIA rendition.
Or better yet "Worst Person"
for a week-end or whenever;
Then giving Olberman a knife
to see what he can sever
From Kramer, Parsons, Fuld and Prince
and others of their ilk
With cries their frauds continue
and involve more than spilt milk.
Bob Carlson
www.politicalboondoggles.com
5/18/09
To 'CNBC's Credibility Crises'
To 'Torture'
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