Nebraska's Own Fukushima?
(With a little help from its friends at the NRC)

Nebraska reactors, how are you reacting?
Missouri flooding is heading your way.
You ain't seen nothin' yet. Keep filling sandbags.
Let's hope NRC standards can survive the day.

Bags used to be watertight but Jaczko relaxed
The standards
for sandbags because as they age
The burlap they used at the time you were built
Has pretty much rotted away at this stage.

Don't worry the public. It's just radiation
And the NRC's hinting it's under control.
Don't tell us they don't have an expert on levees,
That they never thought levees could develop a hole?

Has no one suggested windmills as a replacement?
Thirty years is a long time to be counting on you.
Now how are you old guys supposed to react
When the Missouri River goes over and through?

What's the worst that can happen? So water leaks in.
It becomes radioactive. But will it leak out?
NRC doesn't think so. They're praying it won't.
But we know that it's likely to, without a doubt,

Creating new hybrids. Radiation does that.
It can work even faster than the best honeybees.
Flood tolerant corn? Even two-headed porkers?
Could double production of Nebraskan head cheese!

Bob Carlson
On Twitter @PBoondoggles

To 'Inhofe's Climate Changes: Tornado, Fire & Flood Verses'
To 'The flooding of Nebraska’s nuclear power plants:
       Fort Calhoun and Cooper Nuclear Station'

To 'Nebraska’s flooded nuclear plants:
       flooding may reach Kansas City by midweek'

To 'Level 4 nuclear emergency / classifications:
       America (NRC) vs. International (INES)'

To 'Nuclear Power Loses Its Alibi'
To 'Be Afraid U.S. Nuke Regulators Weakened Rules'
To 'Quick Guide to Nuclear Plant Safety:
       What Could Go Wrong?'

To 'NRC grants Entergy 20-year renewal
       for Vermont Yankee nuclear power plant'

To 'The Nuclear Energy Institute's:
       Nuclear Regulatory Commisione Verses'

To 'Nuclear Malfeasance Verses'
To 'Wikipedia: Head cheese'