Rick Perry says he's proud to abstain from sex.
He claims that his abstinence has worked out just fine.
Mrs. Perry, however, is not that enthusiastic.
"As a husband? A disappointment. His choice is not mine.
"Why'd he get married if he planned to abstain?
Any young Texas wife would surely complain.
Despite what Viagra-less politicians surmised
Our hormones are still active and need to be utilized.
"Why should old guys who cain't still perform
Determine the sex lives of we young folks who can?
Otherwise what's the point of falling in love?
When I married Rick, I hoped I'd get a real man.
"Abstinence, phooey. We want husbands for sex.
But the rules here in Texas are made by sex wrecks.
That Texas men are taught abstinence is our major complaint.
Prospective wives don't know if they can or they cain't."