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The Contented Oil Speculator With a nod to Sir William S. Gilbert's "The Discontented Sugar Merchant" He assures us he's no malcontent, Does Woody B. Bettingon-Brent. But one of his vices Is gaming gas prices. Why, Woody B. Bettingon-Brent? It is easy to see why some claim Woody B. merits so much resentment, Though few can agree how much Woody B. is to blame, Or how best to contain his contentment. Trading on-line from his PCs He jacks up the price of gas with ease. Folks at the pump Can watch it jump Lamenting his source of contentment. Woody's family's driving HumVees, Doing their bit for consumption, While laughing at Mac's assinine gas tax freeze, Quite aware it was Mac's and not Woody's assumption That London's Futures exchange Will effect a momentous change, Opening its books So nobody cooks Them. That was Old Mac's and not Woody's assumption. He's a Bush era faux Robin Hood, For whom Enron's the model to follow. He recalls Ken Lay said a fake shortage would Ensure futures are not hard to swallow. "Rip off the poor; make yourself rich. Can't fill his tank? Ain't that a bitch? Can't bum a ride? Call Countrywide." Why should Woody and Bush be that hard to swallow? You're just a layman. Woody B. is from Lehman, Morgan Stanley and Goldman Sachs, Where ev'ry Tom, Dick and Woody's been busy blamin' Subprime mortgages for their cutbacks, Till this six percent margin Oil futures are chargin' – This manna from heaven – This seven-eleven – So we pay at the pump for Wall Street's cutbacks. You're dead wrong if you think he'll repent, Not Woody B. Bettingon-Brent. Old Mac's newest advice is Get used to high prices And Woody B. Bettingon-Brent.
Bob Carlson |