Not my fault. Who could halt
Accusations of assault
Without disrupting team morale?

"Ped" alerts? Shorter skirts
Revealing more of our perverts?
Why, they'd corrupt our team morale.

Now if a pedophile
Stops for a while,
Haven't we saved face?

So your offspring
Was his plaything?
Why belatedly replace

Us Holy Dads with Holy Moms,
Lose entrée to grade school proms,
And blow the Church's age-old rationale?

Music by Sam Lewis & JoeYoung
Original Lyric by Ray Henderson
Alternate Lyric by Bob Carlson

To 'Popes & Pedophiles'
To 'Pope Put Off Punishing Abusive Priest'
To 'Worlds Without Women'
To 'Oakland Priest’s Accuser Describes Sexual Abuse'
To Lyrics for "Five Foot Two, Eyes of Blue"